The Rigors Of Intelligence
Sometimes I hate being so clever, so charming and prodigious. It can lead to severe psychological problems.
When left to my own devices, I invariably think myself into a severe state of depression. That's what comes from overanalysis. So don't do it.
I was left to my own devices today.
Plus I was very, very tired.
And I've had practically nothing to eat for days.
I think it's understandable that I would be in a stand-offish mood, don't you?
So I spent a lot of time staring.
That's how I think. I stare. Sometimes I think about whatever I'm staring at, but other times.....
Eventually, as I contemplated everything that has ever frustrated me, something I do often, the stare became a glare, and I began to try to burn things with my eyes.
This intensity petered out after a while, and I settled into the regular self-loathing stage, criticizing myself and all my flaws. Not that I expect myself to be perfect. I just don't like a lot of things about me.
Now, I'm kind of draped across a chair, trying to use as little energy as possible in typing, and moaning in agony from all the scar tissue in my mouth, from where I burned myself on some ridiculously hot potatoes.
I'm still left to my own devices.
So I'm venting.
And contemplating, one of my favorite words.
The more I contemplate, the more my normally optimistic demeanor deteriorates.
The future is bleak. Give up.
Boo-hoo.
And this is the point where I slap myself in the face for being a whiny, self-pitying weakling. Willpower is everything. Press onward, forge ahead, don't give up. What a philosophy to live by.
Live by it I shall. I can feel some of that positive attitude returning as I type. Plus, there's always hope. Hope that somehow I'll be able to alleviate my discontent, be able to smother all my weaknesses, be able to continue.
Life goes on, you know?
Man, there's nothing quite like a good depression to renew your outlook on life.
And the supermodel says, "I stepped on three ducks."
In accordance with the prophecy.
When left to my own devices, I invariably think myself into a severe state of depression. That's what comes from overanalysis. So don't do it.
I was left to my own devices today.
Plus I was very, very tired.
And I've had practically nothing to eat for days.
I think it's understandable that I would be in a stand-offish mood, don't you?
So I spent a lot of time staring.
That's how I think. I stare. Sometimes I think about whatever I'm staring at, but other times.....
Eventually, as I contemplated everything that has ever frustrated me, something I do often, the stare became a glare, and I began to try to burn things with my eyes.
This intensity petered out after a while, and I settled into the regular self-loathing stage, criticizing myself and all my flaws. Not that I expect myself to be perfect. I just don't like a lot of things about me.
Now, I'm kind of draped across a chair, trying to use as little energy as possible in typing, and moaning in agony from all the scar tissue in my mouth, from where I burned myself on some ridiculously hot potatoes.
I'm still left to my own devices.
So I'm venting.
And contemplating, one of my favorite words.
The more I contemplate, the more my normally optimistic demeanor deteriorates.
The future is bleak. Give up.
Boo-hoo.
And this is the point where I slap myself in the face for being a whiny, self-pitying weakling. Willpower is everything. Press onward, forge ahead, don't give up. What a philosophy to live by.
Live by it I shall. I can feel some of that positive attitude returning as I type. Plus, there's always hope. Hope that somehow I'll be able to alleviate my discontent, be able to smother all my weaknesses, be able to continue.
Life goes on, you know?
Man, there's nothing quite like a good depression to renew your outlook on life.
And the supermodel says, "I stepped on three ducks."
In accordance with the prophecy.
Pulled from the planet-sized mind of Christopholes around 4:06 PM
3 Comments:
Chris,
You always complain about your life and your ability to overanalyze things. But, you never say what you're overanalyzing. Just thought I would bring that up, because I think you do that on purpose. But, that's just me. And, adding to you're last comment there about the ducks, Jake did NOT step on any ducks!
That's because I overanalyze personal matters. That's what makes my depression so...err...poignant. Were I willing to share the matters I think about, then there would be no point in thinking about them. I could let other people do that for me. Dur.
By the way, maybe he just stepped on a goose or two. That's almost as bad.
I like your attitude chris... Someday.. I promise... well I'll try lol
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